Showing posts with label loss. Show all posts
Showing posts with label loss. Show all posts

Sunday, March 9, 2014

March 9th, Blog a day. Who is most important to you?

March 9th,


Who are the most important people in your life — and how
would your day-to-day existence be different without them?


This is an interesting way to start this challenge for sure. There are several important people in my life: My husband, my kids, my family, my close friends who are my family.

I figure the best way to really dive into this post is to really just dive in.
Recently I did learn what it is like to not have someone very important in my life. Here are the top ten ways my life has changed.

1. You realize that life is short.

In a blink of an eye it's all gone. And you're left with nothing but memories. That's how fast everything is gone. It makes you realize not to take a single day for granted.

2. Sometimes things just never sink in.

There is not a day that goes by that I'm struggling to make sense of what has happened. It makes me sad to have that sudden realization hit me each and every day. And I wonder if it will ever really sink in.

3. Nothing feels the same.

Everything is just different. Everything feels more quiet, things that were once normal seems odd and off. I always feel a little bit sad.

4. There is no more good advice.

I used to call and get the most valuable chunks of life lessons and now I have to sit and think about what she would do.  Or what she would say. I don't have that sweet, loving, ass kicker pushing me through those moments of whatever I have going on.

5. There is no more laidback, relaxing fun moments of simply talking with such an amazing woman.

We could talk about everything. She never was shocked or judging. She always knew how to make me feel better. I loved our talks. I loved each and every moment we spent together. I miss this those the most.

6. My dreams have changed.

Sometimes I feel like she's there with me just in another way. And I wake up sad and it takes a whole day to feel okay again. It's bittersweet.

7. Sometimes I feel like a failure.

I care more now about my choices. I want to make her happy, but at the same time I feel weak and sad and angry. There are days I get down and want to give up on things and then I remember that she never gave up on anything and if she could go through everything she did in life and still be such an amazing person then I need to stops worrying about the little things and just be more like her.

8. I realize love is a strong and powerful thing.

Love makes you stronger than you ever imagined you were. Love makes you whole, it makes you strong. It makes you able to go on. Love is a beautiful thing.

9. I now hope ghost are real. 

I now hope there are spirits. I now hope every little thing is a sign from heaven.

10. Last words, last moments really are important.

Make the most of every moment you have with your loved ones because it really makes a difference at the end. It's not going to fix anything but it will give you a small amount of something to hold onto on the days you are having a hard time.

Love you, Anne!

See you Monday for Playlist of the week
Tell us how your week went by putting together a playlist of
five songs that represent it.

Tuesday, October 8, 2013

Just a thought.

 I don't like to complain or talk about drama.

I'll be honest I'm sad. I have been for weeks now. I make it through the day, I still have so much to be happy about but I am also very sad. I wonder if it will ever change.

I miss her. I miss so much about her. And every day I find myself searching for signs that she is around. I feel like I see them everywhere and to me it feels silly yet so amazing. I feel this connection, I feel her.

Loss is a hard pill to swallow that's for sure. Even harder when the loss is someone who was so beautiful inside and out. I miss talking to her. I miss hearing her voice. I miss everything.

I worry about everyone around me and how they are doing. I don't know what to say or how to maybe even for a moment put a smile on their faces. I'm not good with this stuff.

I'm stronger, I think we all are in ways. And now all I want is to make her happy and be strong just like she always was.